Friday, September 28, 2007

9/28/07- Vaf89 Mailbag...

It's that time again. The time, each month, where I dig into my hundreds of e-mails and filter out only the best of the worst to be answered. "The Vaf89 Mailbag". Enjoy.

Frank from Georgia writes:

"In regard to your post about Dr. Seuss being gay, what evidence do you have to support such a brazen and childish claim? Or are you just making it all up? Maybe you're such a terrible blogger that you feel the need to mislead your readers and go off on wild rants about the sexual orientation of one of our greatest childhood heroes. It's people like you that make the terrorists hate us."

First of all, I severely doubt that I'm the reason that the terrorists hate us. If anything, they would love me for potentially soiling the legacy of one of America's most beloved childhood icons.

Second, I never actually claimed to have any evidence whatsoever that he was gay. I simply just went on a wild rant involving comical bulletpoints that made light of the fact that many of his books(intended for children, mind you) contained many homosexual innuendos. But to answer your question: Yes. I did make up everything in that post. Instead of being original and stealing jokes and ideas from somewhere else, I decided to come up with my own jokes and banter, and put them into print. Fucking idiot.

Jenna from Ohio writes:

"What the fuck do you have against EMOs?"

Dear Jenna,

You are a fucking douchebag. I refuse to be redundant, so I will direct you to the following link:

Now go run along and daydream of razorblades and pointless, silent rebellion.

Pete from Florida writes:

"How can you honestly say that Kanye West sucks? Where are your millions of dollars in album sales?"

I never said that he wasn't successful. I simply just said that he is a terrible artist that just so happens to be appealing to stupid white kids between the ages of 12-16 who live in large suburban areas, while simultaneously setting black people back 50 years. It's people like Kanye West that make the word "nigger" feel so right, when you know it's so wrong.

As for his millions of dollars in album sales, I hope that he loses all of it in a tragedy worse then 9-11, Pearl Harbor, and Hurricane Katrina combined. Also, like me, you too don't have millions of dollars in album sales. But, unlike me, you bought into his bullshit, subsequently adding to his millions of dollars. You should feel proud of yourself for successfully becoming a corporate tool.