Thursday, August 30, 2007

8/30/07- It came from Craigslist!...

Finally, Craigslist gets added to my pantheon of "It came from..." series of recurring segments. This specific entry I can sum up in three words: clowns, cocaine, and crabs. Enjoy!

Posted on Craigslist in "Misc Romance" section on 8/28/07:

"My name is Apples the (female)clown. I am 5'11 tall, 280lbs. I am looking for generous people to donate some money, valuables, or "snow" for my services. I can make personal incalls, but I can also be summoned for private corporate events.

I bring with me over fifteen years of clown experience and can do most any kind of magic trick you can think up.....ANY KIND. Events may also be catered upon request. I can supply a variety of food stuffs including(but not limited to) hamburgers, lobster, veal, chinese, and of course, crabs.

My rates vary but are usually around $250 per hour. For an extra $100 my friend Peaches the midget can join the party as well.

So call me for all of your adult clowning needs at (212)-359-####

Hope to see you soon!"