Tuesday, April 17, 2007

4/17/07- *Special* Two-For-Tuesday: Green Day has seen better days... / Jesus is my roadie...


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Jesus fucking Christ, what happened to Green Day? They used to be good. They used to be punk. They used to be pioneers of alternative rock. What the fuck happened?

Back in the 90's Green Day came out with their first full album: "Dookie" and life was good. It was an album filled with hard, creative, unique sounding rock. It re-launched punk in the 1990's. After that their career started to slow down with each passing album. It even came to a boil in 2002 when they were about to release their latest album: "Valentines and Cigarettes". The legend goes that the record company thought it was so bad that they wouldn't let them release it under the name "Green Day". So instead they formed a new band that "allegedly" had nothing to do with Green Day called "The Network". The Network disguised themselves with masks and big weird looking suits, but people weren't that stupid and easily knew it was really Green Day in disguise. The Network then went on to release "Valentines and Cigarettes" under the new name "Money Money 2020". Needless to say, the album tanked.

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Then Green Day finally found success with their latest album "American Idiot", but at what price? In 15 years they have gone from alt rock pioneers, to has-beens, and now back to the top of the charts. But at the same time have now alienated their true fans by conforming to the ways of the mainstream popular scene. Don't believe me? Look at it like this: no 12 year old girl should have pictures of Green Day on her wall and consider Tre Cool "dreamy". Once that starts to happen you have officially lost your fucking edge. And what's with all of the political undertone in their latest album? People listen to music to escape their shitty problems, not to be reminded of them. Concept album my fucking ass, it's a sell-out album.

Let's just make one thing clear here to all of the bandwagoners jumping aboard the American Idiot express. I still like Green Day, but remember this: my first Green Day album was NOT "American Idiot".


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What is the deal with christian rock? I don't get it. Just the words "christian rock" seem like such a blatant oxymoron.

Now granted I couldn't name a christian rock band if I was held at gunpoint, I do know that these types of bands exist and they do preform to sold out shows. Why? Since when did some God squad kool-aid drinker decide one day that Jesus needed to appeal to the headbanging community? Most rock is associated with drug use and alcohol addiction, real hardcore shit. How in God's name(pun intended) could christian rock even start to be able to come close to beating that? It can't.

"Oh but what about Creed?" Creed fucking sucks! Scott Stapp can go suck my balls. He is not rock! He is merely just the poor man's catholic version of Eddie Vetter.

But the biggest irony has to be catholic grunge music. If you thought regular catholic rock made no sense, then good luck figuring out this shit. How is catholic grunge even possible? Grunge music is supposed to be depressing and borderline suicidal. Now all of a sudden it can be turned around to be Jesus friendly? I don't fucking think so.

In closing, I present you with an analogy: christian rock is to music as Chinese men are to porno, there are few of them and both serve no purpose other then to disappoint.