Friday, June 1, 2007

6/1/07- Good Riddance(time of your life)...

As you all know, these next few weeks are the weeks in which high school students all across the country are going to be graduating in. As a student about to graduate high school myself tomorrow, I felt a need to give a small retrospective and share some of my thoughts and advice, in the hopes that some of you out there will take it and learn well from it.

*Never eat the mystery meat or order the split pea(or more accurately, pee) soup.

*Always make fun of the weak teachers. It's the only way they'll learn.

*Never under ANY circumstances use the school toilets...EVER!

*When taking a foreign language class, always ask about the 7 dirty words before anything else.

*Movies to acquaint yourself with: Varsity Blues, Napoleon Dynamite, Dodgeball, Anchorman, The 40 Year Old Virgin, 300, Billy Madison, and Full Metal Jacket(if you are on the football team).

*If you don't go out of your way to make a name for yourself, someone else will make one for you.

*Beat the shit out of any guy wearing a "Panic at the Disco!" tee shirt. It's the only way he'll learn.

*And lastly. When attempting to do homework, weigh out ALL of your options carefully. Sure, you could be doing homework, or you could be playing Xbox or sleeping or eating or watching t.v. or anything else for that matter. The point is: You have about and hour and change between homeroom and first period. It only takes, on average, a half hour to do all of your homework. Why do it at home when you could be doing something more exciting? Do your homework in homeroom and leave the afternoon for your life. You only get one life dammit, live it to the fullest! Don't waste your time studying for your calculus test. Go play some mini-golf instead.